30 Something

I remember back in the late 80's/early 90's the tv show 30 Something. When I watched it I though 30 was so far away and looked weird, stressful, and busy. Now that I am officially 30 something, I really identify with those descriptions. 2011 will most likely go down as the fastest year on record for me. I don't ever remember a year moving as quickly. Being 30 brought about a lot of changes, for the better, too. We sold our house in GA. I got a teaching job. I finally got my stomach issues resolved. Marlee and Cooper started a new preschool. One word: busy.

The stress comes from my continual struggle to find balance. Going back to the classroom brought about a new set of challenges. Would I still be a good mother while focusing on being a good teacher? Would I be able to give enough to my students when I spend so much time focusing on my own kids? I would give myself a B+ for this first semester. I definitely have room for improvements. The one positive is that I haven't questioned my return to the classroom. Don't get me wrong, I loved being a stay at home mom. But I felt Marlee, especially, had outgrown me. She needs more challenge and interaction. There were several days I thought I was losing my identity. I wasn't sure who Kelly was anymore. Just a 30 year old stay at home mom. Now I am a working mom and appreciate my time with Marlee and Cooper a little more.

As for the weird part, I am the youngest of all of my first cousins. When I was in HS, they were all in their 30s with careers, husbands, kids, etc. I remember idolizing them in my imagination and dreaming of one day being in their shoes. How weird to dream about such things when you're only 13/14 years old? I've always been a dreamer and one to want to rush time along. Now their kids are in my shoes and I am the adult. I just wonder if my life looks weird to them?

Happy Birthday to me! I hope 31 is great!